3 days to go.
On Monday the 12WBT starts and I am nervous.
I've been regularly exercising now for 3 months, I've been eating well without too much trouble (although I've had the occasional 'Screw it all, I'm going on a binge!' moments!), and I've already seen the results just from doing things the way I have been, but there is still a bit of trepidation.
This morning the 12WBTers got an email from Michelle Bridges, that had 3 questions.
Are you afraid of change?
Are you scared you will fail?
Do you have destructive habits?
Obviously the categories are not mutually exclusive. You could identify with all three.
But I think where I fit in is 'Are you scared you will fail?'
This has always been my issue - self belief, in all aspects of life, and I just don't know why.
The FACT is this: When I have set my mind to something, I've almost ALWAYS succeeded at it.
When I wanted a great new job, I got my great new job.
When I decided I was ready for dating again, I found myself an awesome boyfriend.
I studied hard to finish my degree.
I saved my money and travelled overseas.
I was asked on to the creative team for Scrapbooking Memories.
I am the type of person that when I want something, I get it.
Not in an arrogant princessy type way, I've just always worked hard for what I want.
So why the nerves?
Well, case and point is that I don't drive.
What does that have to do with anything you ask?
When I was 16, I got my learner license.
At the time I already had in my head that driving wasn't going to be for me.
A few weeks later, my mother took me for a bit of a drive and I ran her car into our fence, landing the car in our neighbours yard (which was about half a metre lower than ours because we were on a hill).
At that moment I discovered something I wasn't good at, shattering my teenage beleif that I was good at everything, and therefore awesome and invincible, and I haven't driven since.
Of course I'm now 11 years older and a little bit wiser - maybe not 11 years wiser, but hopefully 4 or 5 at least - and I know all too well that I'm not good at every little thing and not invincible (I still like to think I'm a bit awesome sometimes though!), but I'm certain that's where my nerves come from.
I'm still a learner driver at this health and fitness thing.
I'm excited to get past my L's and wear my P plates, but what if 16 year old Skye rears her head and decides one fateful day when I'm having a rough day at the gym that it's all just a little bit too hard.
Or one day when I break my calorie budget that that's it, I've knocked the fence over, I was never good at this anyway and I'm never driving again?
I'm determined that it won't happen and I think that I have a good enough support group and a good enough mindset to see it through.
I think the nerves are probably natural and right now, I have absolutely no intentions of giving up.
So I guess the worst that can happen is that if I get a little side tracked I may have to re-sit the test, but here's to being well on my way to being a fully licensed' driver' in 12 weeks (and 3 days)!